by Irene Daniel
Several months ago I got a call from someone I knew in high school. My caller id informed me that Frank Arthur Celaya III was calling. Those who know me well know that I don't pick up the phone right away. I let it go to voicemail and respond at my convenience unless it is someone I know well or it's a call that I am expecting. But not this time. Something deep inside, some intuitive voice said, "Pick up the phone, Irene. Your future is calling."
Frank and I had connected on Facebook, as old friends and acquaintances often do, but I hadn't known him well in school. He was a few years older than me and when you're young those years make a big difference in how we perceive one another. His little sister, Rita, was in my class and I wondered why Rita's big brother would be calling me. My curiosity, as well as my intuition compelled me to answer; and answering that call was one of the best decisions I have ever made. We talked for hours.
We talked about a lot of things, but mostly we talked about Victims of Addiction. Frank told me his story -- a compelling tale of a family torn apart and financial ruin as the result of his son's addiction to drugs. I learned a lot, although I still wasn't crazy about the word "victim." This realization brought me face to face with my own denial of how I had been, and still was, a victim of many things.
You see, I have survived child abuse, spousal abuse, alcoholism, depression, anxiety and the ensuing consequences of my own bad choices. The foundation of these bad choices lay in the arrogance of denial of my own victimhood. I saw myself as a survivor and overcomer of all the adversity with which life had presented me. I'm no victim, I've always told myself. And this false affirmation was a response to a culture that sees victims as weak; wallowers in self-pity.
I see it all differently now. For now I know that, while I have been victimized, often brutally so, to deny my pain and anguish is to deny myself. And it is this denial that has estopped me from living an authentic life; the ability to show up as the real me, sans masks and false-fronts.
Since that initial conversation, which seems like several lifetimes ago now, Frank, Jackie (our clinical specialist) and I have spent countless hours on the phone, as well as reviewing and editing each other's writings. We have all grown from these exchanges. And we have all been forever changed.
I do everything differently now. I answer my phone when people call unless I am truly unavailable. I am no longer afraid of life; of people, places and things. And most especially, I am not afraid of myself. I don't have to isolate and hide myself away from a world that, in my victimhood, I usually perceived as cruel and frightening.
For I have learned that, while I don't like being a victim of anything, the fact remains that I have been been, and in many ways still am, a victim of other's people's bad choices. And I don't need to blame them -- or me -- for any of those choices. I do, however, need help and loving support to get past it all. And getting past it all is what Victims of Addiction is all about.
Victimhood should always be a temporary state of being. However, as with any injury -- physical, emotional or Spiritual -- refusing to acknowledge our pain only makes it impossible to truly heal and to be made whole again. And healing the families suffering from the bad choices of one of their own is the very heartbeat of Victims of Addiction.
But now we need you, my friends and readers, to bring this transformational message to the 24 million families of addicts. These families are completely lost in a morass of treatment centers, legal fees, financial ruin and the false hope of a paradigm that doesn't work for them. We need you to bring our promise of A New Day, A New Way, A New Hope,to fruition.
Any amount you can give to support our mission would be greatly appreciated. If you can't give (and we've all been there), you can give us an assist by spreading the word to everyone you know. Share this blogpost, share our Indiegogo campaign @ https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/victims-of-addiction, or share our website @ http://www.victimsofaddiction.com/, or our Facebook page.@ https://www.facebook.com/newdaynewwaynewhope/posts/1437699119875845?fref=nf#!/newdaynewwaynewhope?fref=nf. .
Hey! You out there -- our future is calling!!
Copyright 2015, Irene Daniel, All rights reserved.
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